Psychologists are unanimous: if this happens, the relationship cannot be saved
How to distinguish the crisis in the relationship from their end? How to stop kidding yourself and admit that he can never be a full partner for you? Trying to get through to him or stop wasting time? We have combined all the experience of the world’s psychologists and selected the 7 most obvious signs that love in your relationship is out of the question.
You count only on yourself.
Is it easier for you to order a cab to the airport than to ask him to pick you up? You know that if you offer him to pick up your clothes at the dry cleaner on the way, you cannot avoid irritation? You do not want quarrels and prefer to solve minor household problems yourself rather than ask him? Akhmatova had something like this in mind when she wrote: “How many requests from the beloved always! There is no such thing as a lover’s request. When he enthusiastically fulfilled your every wish? That’s exactly, when he was in love with you.
His mood is always with a minus sign.
A man who ceases to feel love, begins to feel a deafening irritation. This happens not always consciously, and an unhappy lover can be difficult to distinguish between the usual depression and temporary problems from the underlying feelings of dissatisfaction that completely changes the background and tone of your communication. In your presence, he has a headache, he irritably asked to speak more quietly, not to distract him with questions, not to annoy him with comments, not to smack, not to smoke, not to whine, not to interfere with him to do anything… Is he no longer sparing your feelings? Doesn’t watch his words? You forgot about the compliments, and the joy is the usual situation, when the day went by without a scandal about and without? Claims are growing like a snowball, and you feel cornered? Consider this: Perhaps you aren’t doing anything incorrectly. . Previously, he could not pay attention to some minor things, and now rebukes on every occasion? Is he picking on you even for things that he didn’t think were a problem before? Unfortunately, if it lasts not for a couple of days, but for months and years, you should admit the obvious: just the disappearance of love makes men irritable and picky.
The lightness is gone.
Home is the rear, where it is always nice and cozy. And love is not just African passions, but a sense of comfort, understanding, trust and common interests. In love it should not be difficult – otherwise it suggests that something has gone wrong and there was a neurotic story of painful relationships, complexes and resentment. Of course, conflicts and quarrels happen in every couple, but if the period has dragged on, you need to look at the situation sensibly and soberly to see what is broken. One indicator of a problem that is very difficult to solve is the loss of a sense of ease in the relationship. You used to laugh at the same jokes, you were not bored together, and now there is no trace of this harmony? Silence has become burdensome, the dialogue does not rivet, and all attempts to arrange a romance or ordinary heart-to-heart talk turned into a theatrical performance, where there is everything but the atmosphere of comfort and joy? You’re thinking what to say so he does not get angry? How do you make him smile? Hurry home so he does not reproach you for the delay at work? Or, on the contrary, keep quiet and drown your resentment if he leaves you and spends time with friends? Unfortunately, the disappearance of the relationship ease and the opportunity to openly discuss the problem – one of the signals that there is simply nothing to save.
He is not interested in spending time with you.
He has begun to avoid you. You initially believed you were imagining. But no – he stays late at work, spending more and more time with friends, at home he asks not to bother him, because it was a hard day. It would seem nothing terrible – like everyone else. But, putting our hands on our hearts, we understand that this happens to all who doesn’t love their partner.
In the courtship period, a man is like an impatient young man – he wants to be near you, to make nice surprises, to pay compliments. You are always not enough for him. Over time, the passion goes away, but in a relationship where there are feelings, there is no place for situations where a man under any pretext tries to disappear from the house and will find a lot of excuses for this behavior. He appeared new activities and interests, new acquaintances, he is increasingly trying to avoid explanations and calls your questions “brain dumping”. In short, you understand everything, but in the vain hope that he just needs to rest, think, cool down. No! Unfortunately, the answer to what went wrong is this: he no longer loves you.
You have no plans together.
A loving couple is characterized by a desire to make plans together.People in a healthy relationship always have mutual goals and talk about how to attain them. . This is the only normal situation, everything else is not. Reluctance to share plans, discuss problems, lack of interest in your affairs – one of the main signals that the man has ceased to feel emotion. As soon as, speaking of the future, the pronoun “we” leaves the lexicon, it is worth thinking that something has gone wrong.
Doesn’t want sex
Do you seriously believe that a man who avoids physical contact with you loves you? Provided, of course, that we are talking about a healthy man. I have to disappoint you: the refusal of sex almost always means only what lies on the surface. If the sexual life is absent for a long period of time, then there is every reason to suspect that the man has another relationship. However, in extremely rare cases, there are situations where he is tired or feeling down from stress, but this period cannot last.
He criticizes you.
Only after falling in love with a woman, a man allows himself to be disrespectful to her. If he began to ridicule your shortcomings, reproach for weaknesses, to devalue your achievements, then, unfortunately, it is important to understand: this is a very alarming bell. Do not flatter yourself with empty talk that he was just tired and periodically breaks down for nothing – it is obvious that he has ceased to care about you.